Worth a Thousand Words
by Missmarauder13
Summary: What if Remus Lupin and Nymphadora Tonks lived and were able to raise their son Teddy. Can they pretend to be a normal family? How long could it last? Especially after Teddy discovers some dirty laundry that Remus was hiding for years. AU RL/NT SB/RL
1. Chapter 1

**Summary: **What if Remus Lupin and Nymphadora Tonks lived and were able to raise their son Teddy. Can they pretend to be a normal family? How long can it last? Especially after Teddy discovers some dirty laundry that Remus was hiding for years. How will this new piece of information affect Teddy's view on his father? AU RL/NT, SB/RL

Author's Note: This is totally out of my element... I'm writing about Remus/Tonks! Except it's with a twist. There is a mention of SB/RL because I can't leave wolfstar. I wish Tonks and Remus did live so that they could raise their son. I can really only read AU Tonks/Remus. I recommend Lies and Letters by SweetDeamon. It was sort of an inspiration for this fic... I'm not copying but Tonks and Remus do have the same jobs as they do in Lies and Letters... its apporpriate that they do.

Warnings: Some language, adult content and all that jazz. I totally agree with SomethingBorrowed with her warnings. Just look at her profile and you'll see.

Enjoy.

* * *

"Have fun at Aunt Rachel's!" Nymphadora said to her thirteen year old son, Teddy. She kissed the top of his bright blue hair before he left via floo.

"I'll see you in a few days," Teddy said to her. He became very good friends with Rachel's son, Nick who was almost a year younger than him. During the summer they would end up sleeping over at Rachel and Andrew's home in South Kensington.

"I actually have to talk to Rachel, and run some errands at Diagon Alley but I'll be back before dinner," Remus told his wife and kissed her quickly on the lips. He left via floo shortly after.

Life was certainly different for Remus Lupin. He was married now, had a son and a job he really loved. He was offered a few years after the war ended the position as Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. He was hesitant but took the job. Ron and Harry made Tonks head of the department a few years ago. Remus could now say that he was stable. Financially and just in general.

Remus never expected to survive the second war. In the past, Remus would hope that he would die but those thoughts rarely surface to his consciousness anymore. He couldn't think those morbid ideas anymore. His wife and son were always on his mind.

"REMUS!" his sister Rachel yelled happily when she saw him. "I have excellent news."

"What is it?"

"I'm pregnant! Andrew and I hope it's a girl!" Rachel said.

"That's a surprise." Remus said.

"I know! But a wonderful surprise!"Rachel got back together with Andrew only a few months after the war ended. Rachel was still grieving over Snape but Andrew supported her. In that time, Andrew got her pregnant and Nick was their son. They decided to give marriage another go and they seemed happy. Andrew was a successful healer at St. Mungo's and Rachel was spending time with her son. She didn't want to be neglectful parent for a second time. They bought a big, two floor apartment in the nice suburb of South Kensington.

"That's great Rachel!" Remus gave her a big hug. "I just had to ask you something and then I have to leave." Remus took Rachel into her den.

Teddy didn't notice where he father went to when he saw Andrew and Nick.

"Hey guys. Wanna play some Quidditch?" Teddy asked them.

"OK." said Nick as he was taking out the brooms. "Where's Uncle Remus? Maybe he wants to play."

"No he wouldn't," Teddy said as he took his broom. "I want to be one of the chasers so Andrew has to be the keeper!" Teddy laughed.

"Fine by me," said Nick. "We're gonna win."

"Don't underestimate me so much. I was the keeper for a few years for Ravenclaw,"

"But wasn't that 100 years ago?" Nick asked, grinning.

"Oh now you asked for it," replied his father looking amused. "Now you're definitely going to lose!"

* * *

That night for some reason Teddy couldn't sleep. So he snuck quietly out of the guest bedroom and went downstairs. He expected to fine only furniture in the darkness but the kitchen lights were on and he heard Aunt Rachel and Uncle Andrew talking. Teddy decided to hide in the living room which was completely covered in darkness to hear the conversation on the other side of the wall.

"What the hell is this?" Andrew asked her.

"Oh my god." she said. Teddy heard her looking through a box of some kind."That's what he was looking for. He thought I might have it since it wasn't with his stuff. That's why he came over and asked while you were playing with the boys." Rachel explained to him.

"Should I just throw it out?" Andrew asked.

"Yeah," she said. "I'll take the garbage out in the morning." she threw the box in the waste basket. "It's all in the past now. He doesn't want anyone to know about it, besides us obviously since we've known about it for years. It seems like another lifetime ago."

"Does she know?" Andrew asked.

"I have no clue. I really don't think so and she didn't notice it at Grimmauld Place. Well, let's go to sleep." Rachel and Andrew linked arms and went back upstairs.

Teddy got out of this hiding place and walked into the kitchen. He took the box out of the garbage bag. He quietly went back to his room. He placed the box on the night table and turned on the lamp next to the bed.

He had no idea what Rachel and Andrew were talking about. Why did the box have to be thrown out. Teddy realized why when he opened it.

There was a muggle picture of Remus at a much younger age. His hair was light brown, no gray and his face wasn't as tired looking. He almost looked attractive. Then there was a picture of one of Remus' school friends, Sirius next to him. Sirius' arm was on Remus' shoulder. Both were smiling and looked like they were up to no good.

Teddy knew that his father had three very good friends in school. He knew the story of the Marauders. At least he thought because the next picture he saw changed what his father use to tell him about his Maraudering.

The picture was a magic photo: Remus didn't have a shirt on and was lying in a bed and then Sirius, who was also shirtless jumped into the bed and messed up Remus' hair.

Remus kissed Sirius on the cheek quickly and then Sirius grabbed Remus and started making out with him. Both of them were laughing.

Teddy threw the box onto the floor. "What the hell?!" he said quietly and picks up the box. Some of the other photos fell and he looked at them. They got more graphic with every frame.

He couldn't bare to look at them. Teddy quickly hid the box in the draw in his nightstand and turned off the lights.

The rest of the night he couldn't sleep because he couldn't get the moving pictures out of his mind.


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks for the reviews!!

Enjoy.

* * *

"Aunt Rachel," Teddy said at breakfast the next morning. Rachel stopped eating her scrambled eggs and looked attentive.

"Yes."

"I--" Teddy didn't know how to word it. "I need to show you something," He shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

"What is it?" Andrew asked his nephew. Nick wasn't up yet so Andrew called," Nick wake up! There's eggs!"

"Um... I rather not say," Teddy said, thinking he said the worst thing ever.

"I think I'm full." Rachel after Teddy's comment. "You can show me now Teddy," Teddy guided Rachel to his room.

All of a sudden Teddy got extremely nervous. Would Rachel be mad at him? What would happen? He hoped that she would explain that it was a prank and that his father never did that. If it was true, Teddy didn't know what he would do.

"Aunt Rachel, what's this all about?" Teddy handed her the box.

Rachel opened the box slowly and it was what she expected unfortunately. She tried to remain calm in front of her nephew. "One minute Teddy. It will all be explained in one minute,"

Rachel ran down the stairs and tears were forming in her eyes.

"What's wrong?" her husband asked in concern.

"Nothing you can do about it. Oh shit shit shit shit!" Rachel answered and now tears were flowing from her eyes. She was pacing quickly.

"Honey please calm down," Andrew said to her and walked over to her and tried to hug her.

"It's too late,"and she jerked away from him. She went into the fireplace and flooed over to her brother's house.

"Remus!" she yelled hysterically.

Remus walked over to his sister. "What's wrong?"

"Is Tonks here?" she asked.

"No she went into work to check over a few things," he explained to her.

"YOUR son," Rachel exclaimed. "Your son found this," she handed the box to him. "I will have no part in this. He asked me what this is but I can't explain that to him. It's not my place. This is something you've been hiding for years."

Remus' expression changed and held the box in his hands. "He saw this?"

"He saw everything!" Rachel said.

"Why didn't you throw it out when I told you?"

"Don't blame me," Rachel said angrily. "This is all your fault. You gave these to me over a decade ago when you were going out with Tonks. Now you have to explain it to your son. Come clean Remus. Please," she was sobbing now. "Oh Sirius, Sirius, Sirius," Rachel was lying on the sofa in the Lupin's living room.

"Rachel," Remus sat down next to her. He got the hair out of his sister's face and tried to soothe her. "I'm afraid to tell him. I'm so afraid because I don't want to let him down. He looks up to me. Never in a million years I would think to have a son who's proud of who I am because I was never proud of myself. The time I was proud of myself was when--"

"Sirius," Rachel cut him off.

"I know, I know," he said. "I love Teddy and Nymphadora and with this," he held the box up. "It makes it seem like this was all an accident."

"It was one," Rachel said in all honesty.

"But probably the best one ever," Remus said. "This will be the hardest thing to tell him."

"You need to tell Tonks too," Rachel pointed out. "Tell Teddy first, then her."

"I know," Remus got up from the sofa. "I'll go over there now."

"Good job Moony," Rachel said to him. Remus looked like he was about to cry when she said "Moony" but he only gave a weak grin and flooed over.

As soon as Remus appeared in the apartment, Andrew said to him "What's wrong?"

Remus only said to him "You know," and walked up the stairs where he knew Teddy would be.

As he approached the door to where he son was, memories of the past when the pictures were take flooded his mind. How could he explain this without changing everything?

There was no turning back after he turned the knob and walked into the unknown.


	3. Chapter 3

Hello! I know it has been a long long time. Or at least to me. I feel like picking this up again. So enjoy!

warnings: some language, descriptions of dirty pictures...nothing too bad, mentions of a slashy past.

* * *

Remus, with one hand holding the box walked in to find Teddy sitting on the bed. He was looking down at the hardwood floor. Teddy's hair changed back to a light brown just like Remus'. Usually that happened if he was upset or tired. His son was getting taller so his feet weren't dangling like Remus remembered. He was taller than Remus was at thirteen and looked healthy. Remus was glad his son did not get any his werewolf qualities. He did not want him to go through any of the pain he's been though. Remus wanted to give Teddy a life he never had. And he thought he was doing a pretty good job.

The grey haired man didn't want to do this to his son. To explain a life that seemed so long ago and foreign now. What would Teddy think of him now? They had a great relationship and Remus knew this would affect it.

"Hey," Remus said and sat next to his son. Teddy kinda slide further away from him. "I know you saw what was in here." He pointed to the box. "You're a smart kid Teddy and I'm not going to lie to you."

"That was Sirius Black in those pictures. You were with him...a lot," Teddy said bluntly. He was staying very calm which he definitely got from his father.

"Yes, yes I was," Remus said. "If you have any questions you can ask me now." Remus was going to put his hand on Teddy's shoulder but the teen brushed him off.

"You really loved him. I can see it in the pictures," Teddy leaned over and took out one of the pictures. It was one of them when they were just out of school. They were cuddling on the couch and Remus gave Sirius and quick kiss on the cheek. Then Sirius gave Remus a sweet but passionate kiss on the lips. "And he loved you."

"Yes. What we had," Remus looked intently at the picture. "was special. I can't even start to explain it."

"Are you gay? What about Mum?" Teddy put the picture away and found another picture. It was the two of them cutting a cake and Sirius smeared the frosting all over Remus' face. "Were you two married?"

"I never married Sirius. We couldn't get married but we had a small party once. It was our own kind of wedding. That was during an anniversary," Remus explained.

"How long were the two of you together?" asked Teddy.

"We got together when we were 16. You know he was wrongfully imprisoned for twelve years and when he escaped..."

"You guys got back together?" Teddy finished his father's sentence.

"Yes but he was killed during the second war so it wasn't for long," Remus looked down because he started to feel something heavy inside. Bringing it up again after all these years and there was still a bit of pain that followed.

Teddy became speechless and wasn't facing Remus anymore. Remus turned him around and said, "I love you and your mother very much. So much has changed. I was so young when I was with Sirius. It seemed like a lifetime ago. You and your Mum mean the world to me."

"You never had that look in your eyes with Mum. You look so happy in these pictures. Does Mum even know?"

"I am so, so happy with the two of you. A lot has changed since then. I've been through a lot Teddy. There were two horrible wars and even though there were years apart from them it felt like there was always a war for me. When you are older maybe I'll show you some memories or tell you. No I'm going to tell your mum after."

"You know that was her cousin! I know that since she mentioned cousin Sirius once. That's disgusting." Teddy got up from the bed. "You are really a freak." Teddy yelled.

"Teddy, you can't talk to me like that! That's very inappropriate!" Remus reprimanded.

"Well what you were doing here was too!" Teddy held up a picture of Sirius on top of Remus. Both of them were naked.

"What It was such a long time ago. Please try to understand-" Remus started to say

"I can't look at you right now Dad. After seeing those pictures. I just need some time alone so just go," Teddy's temper was coming out and his hair had a bit of a red tint to it.

"I'm sorry Teddy you found out this way." Remus said and closed the door behind him. He took a very deep breath. He knew he had to tell Nymphadora before Teddy told her. Remus walked to Rachel and Andrew's fireplace in the living room. Remus saw Rachel sitting on the sofa looking worried.

"So?" She asked him.

Remus shook his head. "I have to tell 'Dora now." Remus sat next to her.

"I'm so sorry Remus. I didn't know he was spying on us," said Rachel as she took his hand and squeezed it.

"It's hard to see those pictures again. I miss him," he confessed. "Even after all these years I feel bit of that heaviness I felt for so long every single day. Even after 'Dora and I started dating I would feel it. But when Teddy was born, it faded and it didn't hurt as much. And then it kept decreasing and now for it to hit me again. It's crazy."

"I miss him too. He was like another brother so I can't imagine what you went through. You have to go to Tonks and tell her. Good luck," Rachel told him.

"Yup. I'll need it," Remus got up and went back to his house.

* * *

When Remus walked out of the fireplace he heard Dora upstairs walking out of the bathroom.

"Rem is that you?" Dora called from the stairs.

"Yes," Remus ran up the stairs when he got to Tonks she gave him a nice kiss on the lips.

"Hi. I was thinking of making dinner for the two of us since Teddy won't be home until tomorrow. I'll make extra for him but I thought we could have a nice afternoon and night," Nymphadora said as she put her arms around Remus. "What's in the box?"

"I really need to talk to you about something," Remus said quickly. "You should sit down." The two of them walked into Remus' study. Remus put the box on his lap and his hands were firmly on the lid.

"What's wrong?" she seemed concerned. "Are you ok?"

"Yeah... I guess."

"You were able to get the wolfsbane for this month right?" she asked him.

"Yeah dear that isn't the problem," Remus said as he took a deep breath. "Teddy found this box in Rachel and Andrew's house."

"And..."

"There are pictures...of me with someone from my past. I never told you this. I thought it would be obvious since you were at 12 Grimmauld Place at times. I thought you would see but I guess you didn't which is surprising..."

"Remus you're rambling. Just spit it out." Tonks started to look really worried.

"I was in a long-term relationship with Sirius and in here are pictures are the two of us. Some of them are graphic. Our son saw most of these pictures," Remus confessed loudly.

"What?! What?! How did he see them?" Tonks was about to take the box from Remus but he held onto harder.

"He found them, Rachel had them and was going to destroy them but Teddy was spying on her."

"I want to see them."

"No. I don't want you to. I can't."

"Tough shit Remus," Tonks forcefully took the box and opened it. She saw a few innocent shots. One that got her attention was the two of them playing with her when she was a little girl. The three of them were waving at the camera as they were holding her dolls. She vaguely remembered this day when he cousin Sirius came over with his "friend" Remus.  
The picture right after that was a graphic one of Remus naked, smiling but also looked embarrassed. He had scars and scratches all over his body. But that wasn't what bothered Tonks, no she never thought Remus' scars were gross. Sirius came into view and started kissing him passionately and threw him on the sofa and started to pleasure him. Tonks noticed that this picture was newer and she recognized that it was taken in the drawing room of 12 Grimmauld Place. She sat there numerous times.

"Oh god. Remus why did you never tell me?"

"I don't know. I didn't think-"

"He was my cousin!"

"I'm so sorry Tonks."

"So that's why you said no at first when I asked you out. You were never even attracted me. You just married me because you knocked me up"

"No no. That's not true!" Remus said while his wife's eyes were getting watery. "I love you 'Dora."

"Were you always attracted to men?"

"No I actually really liked this girl at school... and ended up randomly sleeping with her when Sirius was thrown in prison but that's not really the point." Remus realized after he said that he spilled too much cause Tonks had a look of extreme surprise.

"Oh shit Remus I didn't know you were like that at all. But did u date mostly men?"

Remus did not know how to answer this question truthfully and carefully. He wouldn't call the men and women that were in his love life when Sirius was in jail "dates."

"Um a mixture," Remus said hesitantly. "Tonks I don't really want to talk about my love life from that certain time. After my friends died and Sirius went to Azkaban I was kinda fucked up for lack of a better word." Remus looked down at his hands. Only Rachel really knew what he went through cause she was there and saw it all unfold.

Tonks stared at Remus in shock and distress. "This is a lot for me to take. I feel like there's this whole life I never knew about. I know there's an age difference but I thought you were more upfront with me about things. Apparently you aren't. You are a completely different person," Tonks got up from the bed. "I'm going to stay with a friend tonight. I need to think about all of this."

Remus almost had the urge to beg for her to stay. Like what happened once with Sirius but this time Remus held back. "I understand but please 'Dora I love you so much don't leave for good."  
With that the pink-haired witch left the room and Remus heard her apparate. Remus stared down at the book and said "Sirius even when you aren't here you will always be such a trouble-maker" And for a second after that comment Remus grinned.

* * *

More to come soon! The next chapter will have Tonks, Remus and Teddy all together and how they are coping with this. Will Remus explain more of himself and finally open up? Oh the whole thing about Remus' love life... actually writing a fic about that called "Nowhere Man" check it out. REVIEW PLEASE! :D


	4. Chapter 4

a/n: Hey guys! Yes again it has been so long. Well I'm on break and I got bored. I miss writing since I never really write anymore (I'm a musician). Enjoy Chapter 4!

warnings: some language, mentions of slashy relationship (but that's awesome) and possibly really awkward and/or traumatic flashbacks

* * *

_"Remus I don't know how to tell you this. I hope you take this news well... I'm pregnant," Tonks said to Remus on the sofa in her flat...well their flat now. Remus moved in with her a few months ago. His original location was twelve Grimmauld Place and now it was abandoned. Remus finally said yes to Tonks' advances. Remus was starting to feel very comfortable with Tonks and thinking that this relationship might all work out.  
"What!" Remus said as a spit out his tea. Until she said that sentence. "Oh my god. Wow. Um... how long have you've known?"  
"About a month and a half. I didn't get my period this month," she answered.  
"Oh so you know for sure," Remus said.  
"Yes I do. I even went to Madam Pomfrey. If I went to St. Mungo's they might start asking questions."  
Remus took Tonks' hand. "I love you very much 'Dora."  
"I love you too Remus,"  
"Will you marry me?" Remus asked her quickly. "I don't have a ring yet for you but I've been thinking about proposing to you for a while now. I really am crazy for you and with the war and all I don't know how much time is left. So will you say yes?"  
"Of course I say yes Remus Lupin. You are so smart but sometimes you're an idiot," Tonks gave him a long passionate kiss. Remus started to disrobe her and kissed her neck._

5 months later...  
_"This was a bad idea," Remus said one morning in front of Tonks. They still got the Daily Prophet even though it was crap now but it kept them updated on the other said. "I don't know why I thought we could get away with it."  
"Remus what are you rambling on about?" Tonks asked him. Tonks' stomach was much more prominent now and it was obvious that she was pregnant. "Ignore that shit paper."  
"It isn't that. You marrying a monster like me isn't bad enough what if our child is just like me?"  
"Wouldn't that be rare? Can that even happen?"Tonks questioned her husband's remarks.  
"I don't know. It's not written down really what happens when werewolves procreate."  
"If he/she is a werewolf too I'll love it just as much. I love you don't I?" She smiled.  
"That's all great but in this world we live in now," Remus' tone became very solemn. "You will be an outcast. I can't do that to you or our child." Remus quickly went to their bedroom to grab a few things.  
"Remus what are you doing?" Tonks walked as quickly as she could to the bedroom.  
"Bye 'Dora. I'm so sorry but you are honestly better off without me. I kept warning you. I don't want you or our unborn child to get hurt. So I have to go."  
"What the hell!? Remus what's wrong with you?" Tonks yelled and him but in a pop he was gone.  
_

Present  
The image of the sadness Tonks had when he left her while pregnant all those years ago haunted Remus' memory. He was so stupid and still so messed up. He was partially grieving about Sirius.  
The look on Tonks' face when he was telling her about his past was almost identical to when he left. They had trust issues after he returned. For years Tonks would say to him "Don't you ever leave me again Lupin. That was the worst idea ever." Now they really had trust issues again.  
Remus put the box into his drawer and hid it behind this clothes. He apparated to his sister's house to see if he could talk to her. He found Rachel in her room lying on her bed.  
"I'm nauseous. I forgot about morning sickness." The dark brown hair woman moaned.  
"Sorry to hear that," he said and sat down on the bed beside her.  
"Sorry to hear your marriage is fucked," she said.  
"Thanks...I think. I don't know what I'm going to do." Remus said.  
"She left you?" Rachel asked.  
"No not for good. She is at a friend's house for the night. I hope she comes back. I really do," he said now lying next to his sister.  
"I hope so too. But Rem why didn't you say something sooner to her? I think most people knew in the Order. They never talked about it but Snape did _subtly_ talk about you guys shagging all the time in front of the members. She's a smart girl how did she never hear or see it?"  
"I really don't know. We tried to hide it. Well there were a few moments where we were caught. Sometimes when you are so in love you can't see the obvious."

_Early October 1981_

_After a long drawn out fight about a pointless topic, Sirius Black said to Remus "You know what I don't need this shit from you. You're a fucking monster and a nobody. I'm sick of your lies. I don't know how I coul_d _ever love someone like you."  
"Sirius what are you talking about?" Remus asked his amber eyes big and watery now from those last comments. He tried to take Sirius' hand but pushed it away.  
"You're the traitor! How could I not see it before!" Sirius said_  
_"But I'm not! You're talking nonsense!" Remus said as he approached Sirius to get closer to him.  
"Don't touch me wolf!" Sirius pushed Remus to the ground.  
"What the fuck is wrong with you?" Remus yelled.  
"I'm leaving for good." Sirius said.  
Remus looked dumbfounded but the sudden remark. He got up from the ground. "Don't go Sirius. Please don't. You aren't acting like yourself. I think you've been drinking-"  
Two loud slaps were heard and silenced the room. Remus now looked much older than twenty-one now. His light brown hair that was slightly greying was all disheveled and _t_he scars on his face were more prominent more than ever. One side of his face was now bright red. Remus was holding it._ _"Fine I don't want to see you ever again!" Remus yelled. Sirius slammed the door behind him making the small shabby apartment shake. When Remus knew Sirius couldn't hear him, the werewolf let his tears flow._

Present  
Remus stayed at Rachel's for most of the night. He made sure to avoid Teddy because he didn't want to upset his son even more.  
"Where did you put the box? Did you throw it away?" Rachel asked as Remus was about to leave.  
"No it's is in my sock drawer," he answered.  
"You have to throw it out. Or burn it. It's the only way to move on."  
"I have moved on though," Remus said.  
"Sometimes I see that look Remus. I know you well. We've been through shit and I remember how much you longed for him even after he said those horrible things to you. And how twelve years later you took him back as soon as he apologized."  
"I didn't take him back right away. You're wrong." Remus said defensively. "I don't want to talk about this. You know I can't talk about this anymore," Remus got up and went back to his empty house.  
As soon as he got into his room he took out the box. He held it for too long and went over to the fireplace. He took the x rated photographs out and burned them. He kept all the ones where it was just the Marauders but none of the ones where Sirius was loving.  
Well that was a lie. Remus folded a muggle photograph of the two of them holding Harry and playing with him. Sirius had his arm around Remus in the picture. He hid that among the junk in his study.

* * *

Remus woke up the next morning to find Tonks back in their bedroom. Of course his wife couldn't sneakily get what she wanted and leave again. She was a klutz so her almost knocking over a lamp woke him up.  
"I don't know how the Death Eaters didn't hear you coming from blocks away." Remus smiled at her.  
"That kind of flattery won't get you anywhere," Tonks replied with a serious look on her face. It looked like she was just crying and her hair was that mousy brown color again. "I want this to work. I'll see you and Teddy for dinner later," Tonks got the items from the dresser and left again.

* * *

A/n: I know i said the dinner scene would be this chapter but no it isn't. It's the next one. I promise. Instead you got flashbacks. Review. I'll attempt to update sooner than later.


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